How to Manage Holiday Grief in Yourself and Others

How to handle holiday grief in yourself and others

Who J. Kim Penberthy & Interview USA

The following text is reprinted with the user’s permission The conversationan online publication featuring the latest research.

The holiday season, often considered a time of joy and togetherness, can also be one of the most difficult times for those grieving a loss.

Almost 95% of people who have experienced loss say they are coping at least one symptom of physical or mental weakness. About 10% of them develop prolonged grief disorderpersistent and debilitating grief that does not ease with time.

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Often, this grief is caused by the death of a loved one, but it can also be caused by the loss of a friendship, divorce or job loss.

Sadness doesn’t just affect you mental health but also physical well-beingand may increase the risk heart diseaseimmune dysfunction and even death.

Holidays and special occasions, which often include family gatherings, traditions, and reminders of what is missing, can exacerbate this pain, leaving the bereaved feeling isolated and overwhelmed.

As a clinical psychologist and professor of psychiatry and neurobehavioral sciences Working with cancer patients and their families, I see the deep grief that affects people. I have also experienced personal grief, both when my mother died suddenly at the age of 66, and when my father died at the age of 84 after a long illness.

These experiences, along with my own research, have led me to dedicate much of my career to understanding grief and its effects and finding effective ways to help those struggling.

Grief vs. prolonged grief

Grief is a natural response to loss that includes emotional, cognitive, physical, and social reactions. Common signs include sadness, withdrawal, difficulty concentrating, sleep disruption, and physical symptoms such as fatigue or aches.

Grief is very personal, and meanwhile there is no “right” way to hurt.most people move through the process over time, finding a new balance in their lives.

However, some people have experience prolonged grief disordera condition newly recognized in the golden manual of psychiatry Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Editionin 2022

This condition is intense longing, sadness, or worry for the deceased that lasts 12 months or more, significantly impairing daily functioning. People with this disorder often feel disconnected from life and unable to find joy or meaning.

Unlike non-pathological grief, prolonged grief disorder is associated with chronic activation the brain’s stress response systemespecially in areas like amygdala. The amygdala is a small, almond-shaped cluster of neurons in the brain that plays a key role in processing emotions, especially responses related to fear, stress, and threat. Prolonged grief disorder is also linked mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD.

As you help a friend or family member through their grief, it’s important to watch for the signs of prolonged grief disorder because it requires targeted interventions. Research, including studies I’m doing about usage psilocybin-assisted therapy for the treatment of grief, highlights the importance innovative approaches to help those stuck in the cycle of prolonged grief.

If you suspect a loved one is struggling with prolonged grief, encouraging them to seek help and offering to help them through the process can be life-changing. Resources are available, from grief counseling to support groups. organizations like American Grief Foundation and local mental health services can provide additional guidance to help a loved one get the treatment they need.

Taking care of our grief during holidays and special occasions

Research supports several strategies for dealing with grief, whether it is regular or prolonged:

• Expressing emotions: Suppressing grief can exacerbate mental and physical health problems. Talk to trusted friends, journal, and join support groups it can be therapeutic.

• Participate in rituals: Personal or cultural rituals, such as lighting a candle, visiting a grave or creating a memory book, help integrate the loss into one’s life.

• Create new traditions as ways to honor your loss: If you’re grieving a death, consider incorporating your loved one’s memory into the event by cooking their favorite dish, playing their favorite music, or hanging a decoration in their honor.

• Seek professional help: Cognitive behavioral therapy or complicated grief therapy they can be effective treatments for the long confusion of grief. It is also a psychedelic assisted therapy appears as a promising option in clinical research.

Helping someone when they are grieving

For the bereaved, during the holidays and for special occasions like birthdays or Mother’s Day can be particularly difficult. Here are some practical tips to help someone who is grieving during these times:

• Remember that grief is not a problem to be solved, but a process to be supported.

• Be present A common fear is saying the wrong thing to the grieving person. Often, it’s not about saying the “perfect” thing, but about showing up and listening without judgment.

• Acknowledge the loss. Saying “I’ve been thinking about (her loved one) and how much they meant to you” or “I want you to know that I’ve been thinking about you and the importance of what you’re going through right now.” more convenient than avoiding the subject.

• Offer practical help. Grief can be debilitating and exhausting. Helping with tasks like cooking, shopping or childcare can ease some of the burden.

• If you don’t know what to say, it’s okay to admit it. A simple “I don’t have the right words, but I’m here for you” means a lot.

• Avoid “They’re in a better place” or “Everything happens for a reason.” Although the intentions behind them are often good, these claps can feel dismissive.

• Focus on empathy and validation. Saying “This must be really hard for you” or “Tell me more about how you feel” opens the door to meaningful conversation and helps make room for the complex emotions that come with grieving.

• Respect your grieving loved one’s boundaries. Let them respect their emotions by going at their own pace.

Navigating the holidays and special holidays can be complicated for those who have experienced a loss. But in these moments your presence and compassion can help their healing.

This article was originally published The conversation. read it original article.